When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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