I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
