So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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