i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
