i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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