Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
honey bunches of taint.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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