You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
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I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
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