Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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