There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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