It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
ttyl tear gas
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
