3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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