we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
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At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize