His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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