All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize