her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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