is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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