If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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