i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never drinking with the goths again.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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