I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
My hand turned me down
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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