im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
