Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
bring money and cleavage
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
