Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
