the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
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