I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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