just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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