He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
