so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
