I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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