fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize