Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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