I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
