chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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