ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
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