What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Randomize
