Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Randomize