we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
We left an ass print on the piano.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
