I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
