I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
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Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
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The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.