my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
