Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
