If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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