so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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