We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Randomize
