Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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