There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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