its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
