i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize