Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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