Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
