Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
