I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
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