Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
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I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
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You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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